Things.

You know, things and stuff. I’m procrastinating about writing something, so naturally I’m going to write about something else.

Things I Like:

The all female Ghostbusters reboot. Yeah, I said it. (I’m also OK with Johnny Storm being black in the recent Fantastic Four film.) This really shouldn’t be an issue, but that’s nerds for you.

Andrew P Street’s writing for the Sydney Morning Herald. If you’ve not been reading his column (It appears on the website Sunday through Thursday), this this piece (Written in the wake of last November’s attacks in Paris) is the place to start.

Star Wars: Episode 8 starting production. 34 seconds of footage should not make me so happy. Furthermore, the mid season trailer for Star Wars: Rebels which kept upping the awesome factor. A Sith Holocron! Yoda! “Call me Old Master…” VADER. *Tingles*

That there’s a new Conan RPG being Kickstarted. It’s taken a lot of willpower not to go “SHUT UP BY CROM AND TAKE MY MONEY!” That and the fact it’s a system where the To-Hit check is rolling low. Given my luck with dice, I CAN’T FAIL.

The score to Highlander. Not the Queen score mind you, which is fantastic, but Michael Kamen’s orchestral work. Listen to this and tell me you don’t want to stand on a mist enshrouded mountain holding a huge sword and striking a pose. You can’t can you?

Things I Dislike:

The comments. Yeah, there’s a shock.

The lack of Book 3 of The Kingkiller Chronicles. Though as much as I may complain, I’m happy for Patrick Rothfuss to write at his own pace. If that means we get a less stressed author and a better book, I’m OK with that. (I also feel the same way about the next instalments of A Song of Ice and Fire, Peter Grant and Locke Lamora .)

My latest con game. I’m not grumbling about that, I enjoy writing them, more the research. You see, the PC’s in this one are Fox News anchors, and that means actually having to watch that diabolical channel. *shudders* This dirt, it won’t come off…

No shortage of other things. It’s perfectly summed up in a First Dog on the Moon shirt, specifically this one. I haven’t seen a piece of clothing that so summed me up in well, ever.

The fact that I just realised I’ve not used Mark Sheppard as an NPC in any of my games. Sure, most of mine of late have been historical swashbucklers, but still, that’s an oversight I need to correct. Also, I now want to watch Leverage again and DAMNIT TOO MANY SHOWS NOT ENOUGH TIME. *sigh*

There’s 2 kinds of people in the world my friend…

Tonight’s Deadlands session, a brief recap. Also, an illustrative lesson in why dice hate me.

We’ve gone to burn out some cultists (Who’ve been sacrificing to a fertilty demon in the wheat fields). After some Anarchist Shandy’s (AKA molotov cocktails) have been thrown and those of us who’ve failed haven’t set ourselves on fire, the cultists rush at us.My Huckster decides to cast a couple of bolts at them, and boosts the damage. Since it’s an expensive spell, I decide to Deal with the Devil for the points. It does… not go well.

Out comes the Backlash table, which results in the spell doing damage to me.That takes off my right arm in the magical explosion (Sadly no green flame), and the next round I fail my save and die. On the bright side, it took the 2 cultists with me, with the only other casualty being my horse. I also fail the card draw to have my character return as Harrowed, which is a mixed blessing. That’s an improvement, which the players in my 4th Ed game can tell you about. Jokes about how the explosive cards fell back down my sleeve follow, many of them made by me.

So, I’m currently deciding between a martial artist (Because their powers don’t cause backlash and The Warriors Way is a fantastic film) or gunslinger for my next character, and not at all cause I now have Bon Jovi’s Wanted Dead or Alive stuck in my head.

There has been an awakening…

For those of you patiently awaiting my thoughts on Star Wars: The Force Awakens, you’re in luck. There be spoilers, so you’ve been warned.

Now, numerous other folks will have done long in-depth reviews, having first spent hour’s trawling through rumours and speculation. I don’t have that level of patience and was trying to avoid spoilers beforehand, so I’ve chosen to split this up Sergio Leone style and talk though things by category – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

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Where do I start? Whoever was responsible for the trailers deserves have their work analyzed for decades to come. A near perfect mix of nostalgia and new, they also told us virtually nothing about the film, a rare feat in this day and age. (See The Phantom Menace trailer which all but told you in GIANT LETTERS Qui-Gon was going to die) I was going to be seeing the film regardless, but trailers of that quality only increased the antici…pation. After all, Revenge of the Sith was over 10 years ago, and while the animated series The Clone Wars and Rebels have helped to wash away the bad taste of the prequels, the film still had it’s work cut out for it to be accepted along the classic trilogy. There’s some issues, but it more than succeeds as far as I’m concerned.

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Note to trailer editors: leave this sort of shit out of it please.

The big question to get out of the way is “Is it a good film?” The answer to that is a resounding yes. Sure, it’s not as good as Mad Max Fury Road, but that was ALL SHINY AND CHROME, erm I mean bloody phenomenal. It looks and feels like Star Wars again, with the coldness of the First Order’s military contrasting with the battered and worn feel, of well, almost everything else. See also: the increased amount of practical effects and actual sets instead of a couple of couches and a green screen.

And Carrie Fisher is taking none of your shit. NONE.

BB-8. Everything BB-8 was glorious and I want ALL THE MERCHANDISE EVER. Well, maybe not all of it, but he was definitely the standout. I’m still chuckling over the thumbs up moment.

The Stormtroopers are threatening again. This, this is a big thing, as over the years they’ve become a running joke alongside Red Shirts. I might be happier if the show of force didn’t happen to be massacring innocent villager’s as I’ve always been squeamish about that sort of thing.

The first sight of the Falcon, closely followed by Han and Chewie’s homecoming. Yeah, the mention of a piece of junk should have given things away, but it still made me giddy. I might have also shed a few years of joy DON’T JUDGE ME.

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I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

The lightsaber work. Yeah, only 3 people wield one, so it’s not exactly chock full of them. And yes, one of them is half trained (And spends more time smashing up walls rather than duelling) while the other two (one of whom has military training and the other has more experience with staffs) have never held one before, but this has the side effect of cutting out a lot of the spinny flippy stuff from the prequels. It gave way to a more, dare I say it, grounded form of swordplay. And yes, I like the cross guard lightsaber (The long sword was always my preferred weapon). It’s about damn time someone in the that universe does something to protect their hands, even if they do need OHS more. Seriously, a tiny walkway without hand rails over a nigh bottomless pit that’s burning with the power of a sun? I’ve not seen health and safety violations that grievous since Erebor in the Hobbit films.

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Hey kiddies, that’s what quillions are for!

The fact that I have (so many) unanswered questions is something else that brings me great joy. Io9 has a long and updated list of them, with my thoughts centred on how did Maz get Luke’s lightsaber (I did love the ‘I’ll explain later’ approach to it) and how did the political situation evolve from the end of Return of the Jedi? Some might say it ruins the happy ending of that film and to an extent you’d be right, but there has to be conflict to help breed drama, otherwise you wind up with S1 of Star Trek: The Next Generation. It’s got me wanting to read the novels again, an achievement after the Yuuzhan Vong saga.

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I don’t want to call it bad, but the soundtrack seemed to be lacking something. It’s John Williams, so it’s far from bad, but was lacking that big epic track, like an Imperial March. Even the prequels, for all their flaws gave us Duel of the Fates and Battle of the Heroes, both wonderful pieces. The second time round I was noticing more the re-use of old themes, notably Han and Leia’s and the Force themes. It fits in with the nostalgic feel to the film, but it also means it doesn’t stand on it’s own. Maybe a few more listens will help though.

Some have said that’s overly reliant on plot points from earlier films and to an extent they’re right (What, you say there’s a nigh invincible planet killing super weapon we have to destroy by flying down a small trench? Must be Tuesday.) I can’t fault Abrams and co for doing so though – you need enough familiar elements to bring in the old guard, while hopefully keeping them coming back for the next one. (Based on the box office, they managed that one handily.) Also, the First Order basically worship the Empire and what did they do? Build increasingly impractical super weapons!

“And now it’s springtime for Hitler, and Palpatine…”

You could also say it’s strung along by nostalgia, with a familiar face popping up every little while to remind you of the movies you loved as a child. That’s not a complaint from me, as it was done well. There was enough nods (Both overt and otherwise) to keep the fans happy, but most importantly if you didn’t know them it didn’t matter one bit. It’s got that in common with the new series of Doctor Who, which has done a wonderful job at nostalgia without tying things up in pointless continuity references (As it did in the 80’s). Also see Attack of the Clones, which put virtually everything you ever wanted in a Star Wars film (Boba Fett! The Clone Wars! Christopher Lee!), but did it really, really badly.

For all the build-up before the film Captain Phasma sure didn’t get to do much. Heck, the speed with which she relented and dropped the shields led to a theory she’s actually working for the Resistance as a double agent. Mind you, being confronted by an angry Wookiee would certainly impact your views. Either way, I believe she’s been confirmed to reappear in Episode 8, so we shall see. Regardless, the armour looked great and I’m sure the 501st are salivating over the costuming opportunities presented. The First Order do continue the long-time trend of bad guys having the snappiest uniforms)

RIDE TO VALHALLA ALL SHINY AND CHROME!

Most of my other complaints, as they are, centre around the series of increasingly useful coincidences. Such as, R2D2 has spent how many years on low power while people try to avoid tripping into him or using him as a doorstop? How exactly does Poe manage to get off Jakku after earlier ejecting from the TIE Fighter? It’s not that they detract from the film (Like counting ammunition in a Schwarzenegger film), but looking back on it they could have been explained better. Oh well, that’s probably more fodder for the deleted scenes on the Blu-Ray.

TGTBTU-Tuco

Well, we had to mention it sooner or later. I’m fairly certain you know the moment I’m talking about. Damn. I should have known the moment was coming (It certainly explains how cheerful Harrison Ford has been on the promotional trail), but that still hurt, hard. And to top it all off, his last waking action is to caress the face of his son. Excuse me a second. WHO’S CUTTING ALL THOSE FUCKING ONIONS HERE? Right, back now, It worked for the story, and it was wonderfully executed. There’s that brief moment when you think it’s all going to work out and have a tiny bit of optimism, and then BOOM. And that’s another icon of my childhood gone. Coming in the same year in which we lost Leonard Nimoy, Terry Pratchett, Phil ‘Philthy Animal’ Taylor and Lemmy Kilmister, it’s been a shit year. Yes, Han’s a fictional character, but I’ve known him for longer (So to speak) than many of my relatives. I realize that’s an incredibly harsh thing to say, but these are relatives I’ve seen once or twice since I was 6 so, all things considered… Look, it still hurts, I’m allowed to be irrational.

Also, I really want that jacket. Preferably in black, but I’ll take brown.

So, to end things. Is it perfect? No. But let’s face it, it was never going to be. But it’s still a damn good film worthy of your time and money. I give it 4 planet destroying super weapons out of 5.

God is dead.

Lemmy Kilmister – 1945 – 2015

There are very few people in this world that could get me to purchase alcohol, even if only for the purpose if pouring it out in salute. Lemmy was one of those people.

This should be a time to celebrate his life, not mourn his passing. To talk about the good times, share fond memories and swap stories of his deeds and I hope to do that in the days to come. The one I still chuckle at was the one about his plan to change his blood, based on a story about Keith Richards doing the same, in order to help detox or some such. The doctor apparently took a sample, did some tests and listened to Lem detail his lifestyle, then shook his head, saying “Fresh blood will probably kill you!”

We all knew the day would come, as much as we liked to joke about his immortality (The common line being ‘The only things left after the bomb will be cockroaches, Lemmy and Keith Richards’). But that doesn’t ease the sting of the news. Goodbye Lemmy, and thank you. Your music shall be played long and loud.

Episode 7

I have seen it.

I will say no more for the time being other than A: seeing a Star Wars film without the Twentieth Century Fox fanfare is really frickin’ weird and B: John Williams retains the ability to yank at my heartstrings like no other composer.

Going down to Zedtown

(Disclaimer: the following is written entirely from my point of view. Any and all inaccuracies, misconceptions and typos are mine.)

Rumours swirl of dark events in the city. The CDCP have set up quarantine zones throughout the area, but are denying anything is wrong. Whispers speak of the walking dead and other, darker, creatures. The Apocalypse has come, but will you survive the night? Gather your comrades and load your weapons amigo, and welcome to Zedtown.

Zedtown is an 850 player zombie apocalypse Nerf war that ran at Sydney Olympic Park last Sunday. Basically, it’s a giant game of tag played by adults with toy dart blasters. The basics are as follows: if you shoot a zombie, they have to return to re-spawn. If a zombie tags you, you become one of them. Simple. That’s really all you need to know, though being able to engage the following helps:

Your inner 10 year old.
Your inner paranoid maniac.
The feeling of machismo you get when sugared up and watching 80’s action movies.

At the start of the game, the humans are split into 3 factions (Red, Yellow and Blue), with a small number of zombies released about 20 minutes in.There’s also 3 special zombies, known as Original Zombies, or OZ for short. The OZ’s are special in that they’re in disguise, resembling normal human survivors, and from 5 minutes in can start tagging them and turning them into zombies. This results in Cold War levels of paranoia, with a frantic race to try to identify them being one of the few things that the factions will work together as one to complete. The squad I’d joined up with (Not knowing any other players in my faction) kept weapons trained on me for most of the opening hour (To be honest, I can’t blame them), with a joke from another player almost leading to shots being fired. Nerves were starting to fray early. This event had introduced survivor vs survivor fire, which seemed to work well, despite some complaints leading up to it. (Basically, if you got shot by another human, you had to go back to your faction’s base to respawn.) It added an extra element of ‘Humans are dicks and will fuck each other over happily!’ when the sensible response is to combine forces and fight as one. Maybe next event…

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The pre game briefing, shortly before all hell broke loose.

I’m now horribly tempted to sign up as an OZ for a future event and keep myself hidden until about an hour to go. Rest assured I’m not actually going to, cause that shit takes effort and I have a horrible poker face (Seriously, I’m an awful gambler – even in video games). But the looks on people’s faces if you could pull that off would be magnificent.)

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Who else would you trust to save the planet?

Other random moments of awesome: Incredibly Shouty Guy and his slightly quieter counterpart, Slightly Less Shouty Guy Who’d Lost His Voice. The incredibly efficient Russians and Red Berets. Walking with a horde of zombiers to the last enclave of survivors chanting “ONE OF US!” The observation from a squad member that the factional conflict is showing us how racism works (We hadn’t met them and already hated Blue and Yellow) and discussing whether hiking up my kilt at zombies would break the rules (Yes, I was wearing underpants. I don’t kilt up without them, no matter how much my wife complains) The Holly Jolly Christmas Squad (Who attended the previous game dressed as the Brides from Mad Max: Fury Road), and the dancing zombie with a speaker on his back (I’m guessing in homage to Doof Zombie from the last event who apparently had thrown his back out and couldn’t attend). Escorting a zombie close to our base who claimed to want to talk peace. It was an interesting idea (Leaving aside the whole ‘zombies wanting peace thing’ which was pretty bloody weird), but an NPC corporate exec shot him, so that idea went down the gurgler pretty quick. And at some point I’ll make it out to investigate the bar that’s hidden somewhere in the play area.

Survivors, strut!

FUN FACT: We also discovered that yelling “WOAH” repeatedly and randomly pointing guns at people is an impressive distraction tactic.

At first, the zombies are seen in small groups, and a group of survivors who don’t panic can deal with them without too much trouble. There’s also the Witch, a fearsome creature considered unkillable (Rumours persisted she could be pacified with sugar, with our faction being issued with fun size Snickers bars just in case). Initially restrained by the CDCP (You could go visit the cage she was in!), she broke free about halfway through the day and roamed the grounds, a terrifying scream announcing her presence. She swiftly became an object of such fear that large groups of players would simply run rather than confront her, which worked wonderfully. Case in point: late in the game (After I’d become a zombie) we were pursuing a large group of players who’d formed a defensive line. It was Mexican standoff time and all we needed was the guy who’d been whistling the theme to ‘The Good, the Bad and the Ugly’ to turn up to help soundtrack things. Then one of our group screamed and the players (Who had been looking rather cocky up till that point) broke and ran immediately. Causing fear is a wonderful thing.

The CDCP and their… creation.

It’s when the numbers start getting higher (And they do) that things start to tip in the zombies favour. Watching the survivor count, or the faces of other players, drop when the count is announced get’s tense. In fact, it’s remarkable easy to buy into the whole experience – at a certain point it stops being a game and turns into a desperate life or death struggle, albeit one that we all survive. And that’s even before it got dark, which amped up the paranoia even further. Walking through the stadium watching over the group planting beacons, then hearing the zombies scream over the other side was a real “oh, bugger” moment. It was shortly after that when I got tagged, while hiding behind a fence. I was a bit miffed, but I’d laster till nightfall, much farther than I’d expected to get, so I was well chuffed.

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In all fairness, if you thought she was coming round the corner, you’d run too.

FUN FACT: Cowardice and unfitness is a remarkably useful survival strategy! Not a good or efficient one, but it worked well for me.

From 850 survivors at the start, only 13 brave and lucky souls made it out to be evacuated. A mere 13. Around 48 made it out of the last event, and that only had 700 players. The Blue and Yellow bases both fell relatively early (I believe it was still light – I didn’t spend much time at Blue), and there seemed to be a last stand late at the Red base, but I was walking back to the re-spawn area and missed it. It was a glorious day, albeit one that my legs are still complaining about.

Looking to survive the next event? Here’s some tips that may help you!*

Comfortable footwear. I can’t stress this enough. Comfy shoes are a must, even before weapons. You can make it through the day with minimal firepower, but you still need to be able to move.
Bathrooms. Shelter is useful, as are comrades who’ll watch your back. But knowing a safe spot to pee is incredibly useful. Even more so when you badly need to and realize the closest toilet is in enemy territory.
Comfortable costume. It will be hot, you will be running. Being decked out in masses of camo gear may feel awesome, but there’s no point in wearing it if you’re going to melt. I can’t throw stones though, as I (For reasons unknown but I’m claiming awesome) decided to wear a kilt. Why? Breeze. Breeze is good.
Stake out sources of water and food. Ideally, you’ll have a bottle of water (Which you’ll need) and some snacks in a back pack, but more never hurts. Don’t forget though: the zombies also know this.

As for weapons, there’s two main schools of thought on this. The first is pack a pistol, maybe a small rifle and go lightly armed, relying on stealth, speed and cunning. The second is to tool up with the largest most intimidating blaster you can find, carry enough ammo to last you through a small war (Or a Schwarzenegger film) and spend the day quoting Jesse Ventura from Predator. Both schools of thought have their adherents and it’s not up to me to pass judgement. I prefer to run lightly armed myself, mainly because I’m lazy and unfit and prefer to have less stuff to carry to and from the event. Whatever works for you and, more importantly, let’s you feel like the lead in your own action movie.

There’s no word on the next event, but I’m itching for it. One of the housemates and I are planning to costume like we’re in a spaghetti western. Between us we should be able to handle a fistful of zombies…

NOTE: All photos were taken from the Zedtown Facebook page.

*Tips may not actually help. I claim no responsibility if my advice get’s you tagged in the first 30 minutes.

On workplace decorum

Things I have almost yelled at work: “Hey, it’s Bargearse!”

The long version: a recent promo for Brooklyn Nine-Nine used the theme from Bargearse and it took a lot of willpower not to call attention to it, at volume. However, given the A: age and B: comedic taste of my coworkers, I elected not to. Probably for the best that.

For those unfamiliar with early 90’s ABC comedy shows, here’s the saga in all it’s flatulent glory:

All wings, report in.

I never knew just how much I needed a Rogue Squadron movie in my life until today.

Bond, James Bond…

Musing recently about the lack of an Assassin’s Creed style James Bond game (How has this not been done already?), the thought, as my brain frequently does, turned to LARP. What followed was a couple of minutes of brainstorming with a housemate and a train ride or two of writing.

1: SPECTRE

It’s that time of year when Number 1 summons all of SPECTRE’s top brass for the annual meeting. Sadly, owing to the activities of a certain British secret agent who shall remain nameless (*cough* Danger Mouse! *cough*), things aren’t looking too good. Can you wheedle enough cash/resources/favours out of the other top brass in time to please Number 1? Perhaps you’ve been skimming and need to get some fast cash, dislike another boss enough to frame them to want to move up the pecking order or are you just James Bond in disguise?

So, what sort of shenanigans can SPECTRE’s top brass get into before Number 1 show’s up? Each member will have a different area of expertise (Smuggling, trafficking, extortion etc) and a certain amount of resources. Naturally, everyone is running short on something and everyone should have something the other wants. Oh, and evereyone hates each other. No honour among thieves after all.

2: PRE CREDIT’S SEQUENCE

Obviously/sadly most LARP’s won’t have the resources to build a lair in a hollowed out volcano, but the pre credits scene from Goldfinger, something resembling that is more doable. What follows is a 10-20 player NERF war scenario.

In short: M has ordered James Bond to blow up a SPECTRE facility, preferably without being detected. Runs should be from 10-20 minutes each (Depending on the venue size), with Bond’s player changing each time.

1 player is James Bond, everyone else is a SPECTRE mook. Bond must infiltrate the enemy base, plant the explosives and get out unseen. He has a silenced* pistol with 2 full loads of ammo, the explosives he needs (Set to a short timer), and his wits. His pistol will kill anything in one shot (No matter where it hits), but he has limited ammunition and probably be shouldn’t be pissing about trying to kill everyone he can when there’s women with sexual innuendo based names he could be trying to seduce. Priorities right?

The mooks start out unaware of Bond and wander the area at random. They can be taken out either with pistol fire, or by incapacitating them with either a tap on the shoulder (Simulating the Bond/Shatner/3^rd Doctor shoulder chop) or by wrapping something soft around their throat from behind – maybe crepe paper or a sock, this takes them down immediately. Bond’s player can drag them into cover if they wish (with the help of the knocked out player). Any mook dragged into a bush must hide and can give no information if found by other players.

The mooks all carry machine pistols (fly wheel guns, in order to distinguish themselves from Bond’s gun). There are several alarms bells scattered throughout the map, as well as the location that Bond has to set the explosives at, which will change with each run. (This is done to stop sneaky players noting where everything is in order to help themselves along.) All mooks will know where the alarms are– if the alarm bell is rung all mooks should head towards the alarm area.

(Whether or not Bonds player wants to wear a tux underneath their spy clothes isn’t necessary, but is highly encouraged.)

The difficulty could be boosted by adding more mooks, shortening the time or allowing them to make a loud gurgling sound when taken down. Alternatively, you could add a SPECTRE assassin stalking Bond (See the opening scenes of From Russia with Love), or another freakish henchman such as Oddjob or Jaws. I’ve not seen a LARP safe version of Oddjob’s hat, but I’m sure one could be worked up.

*Obviously we can’t fully silence a Nerf gun, but between the mooks having motorised guns and playing dumb, we should be able to represent it.

I bloody love Black Sabbath

Yeah, I’d like to be able to say something profound or mind altering, something that would help heal the sick, help the poor and win the war on terror, but sometimes all you can do is express your love for a band. (Actually, that’s something I do frequently, but that’s beside the point) I recently re-purchased their first album and listening to it again reminded of just how damn good this band is. (Yes, I consider it the first metal album – Purple and Zeppelin come close, but none are more black than Sabbath) It’s hard for me to imagine how much of an impact that thing must have made when it first appeared all those years ago. I first heard it many years back (On vinyl no less!) and it scared the heck out of me. I thought myself familiar with all things metallic (Being young and ignorant), but that thing genuinely unnerved me, in a way I’d not felt since I saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit.*

I could talk for hours about the guitar work of Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler (Bass) and Bill Ward (Drums) are one of the greatest rhythm sections ever to take the stage and there’s Ozzy. By all rights, a voice like that should work, especially not not compared to the metal singers to follow him. For someone who helped birth a genre, he sure doesn’t sound like those who came after. It’s a voice like no other, thin and kinda whiny, nothing like the leather lunged screamers like Rob Halford or Bruce Dickinson or the more guttural technique of Tom Araya or Chuck Billy.

I’m not a musician, so I can’t discuss musical technique or theory. Yeah, Iommi strings his guitars differently after his accident (That cost him several fingertips on his fret hand) but I’m stuffed if I can work out how it makes his playing different. I don’t know how to explain what they do, but what I do know is this: IT’S FUCKING AWESOME. I’m sure you’ve heard Iron Man thanks to it’s inclusion in the MCU,but there’s more, far more to them. There’s the rumble of bass that opens Children of the Grave, the 7 minutes of DOOM that is War Pigs, the solo in Wheels of Confusion or the opening of Sabbath Bloody Sabbath, a guitar riff that can LEVEL CITIES. Don’t believe me? Listen and BE PROVED WRONG. Just reinforce your house first.

I didn’t see them when they toured on the 13 album a couple of years back, lack of funds and the public slanging match between Osbourne and Ward put me off. I did however get to see the lineup led by Ronnie James Dio (Who joined after Osbourne was fired) in 2007 and it was one of the greatest nights of my life, even with the idiot a few rows over who spent the whole show screaming for Paranoid. You’re up in the nose bleeds of the Entertainment Center – do you really think the band are going to hear you? The best part was when someone finally explained the band would only play Dio era material and he started yelling for Holy Diver. *sigh*

I guess my final words (For know) are this. Ignore the mud slinging and public wars of words, the reality TV show and every word that Sharon Osbourne ever says. Just listen to the music. It’s more than worth your time and the damage to your hearing.

*It’s been at least 25 years and I still refuse to watch that film again. I am unashamed of that fact.