Have you tried, not being an adventurer?

AKA “I used to be an adventurer but then I had to explain it to my family.”

So, last night’s D&D session got a little strange. Smallcloths got discussed again, a level was gained, they didn’t get in trouble with the law and the Wizard had another bath! A recap follows, though it’s likely to be very out of sequence as I was both improvising a lot of the adventure and laughing even more. As always, my players are welcome to correct me.

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“He’s not high-strung, he’s not a Bard!”

After dealing with the Night Druids, the newly 3rd level party had moved to a local tavern to eat and discuss their next move. While the Paladin (AKA Doctor Love) was attempting to matchmake, it was decided to go back to the Roaringhorns estate (Minus the Rogue, who went home to bed) to join back in with the seemingly perpetual party, both to see if any further developments had ensued and so the Ranger can catch up with the Half Orc she might be hot for. Both of those things ensued, with the Fighter being told that one Denius Huntsilver, a young Noble who was training as a Druid had vanished a couple of years back on an expedition. The Wizard pocketed more cheese and the Ranger some meat, as she’s gathering spell components (50GP of fine foods and rare herbs) to help find her animal companion. Unfortunately, the kitchen doesn’t have the 11 secret herbs and spices needed. The Ranger (Having lured the sexy Half-Orc outside) was also planning to free the animals from the local zoo, which kind of petered out. That wasn’t exactly what the Half-Orc was expecting, but he was too polite to say. The Wizard’s cockney accent continues to be contagious and may well be the local accent now.

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“Sharks are the bears of the sea.”

The Paladin took a by now very drunken Wizard back to the temple and left him in the bath, propped up so he won’t drown. This resulted in a very strange wakeup call (Waking up naked in a bath is one thing, but also being surrounded by a bunch of ab-tacular Priests of Sune?) I can’t blame him for screaming*. The higher ups at the temple have politely indicated that could anyone else he brings back please be quieter, but I doubt that’s going to happen. The Ranger and Fighter made their way to the Rogue’s estate, where, in an unprecedented shock, he was awake before noon. This resulted in the rest of the party spontaneously NPC’ing his family, who were less than thrilled by his adventuring hobby, with his father demanding he go back to bed and not return until at least noon. The longer it went on the more I thought I should stop it and get back to the adventure, but it was too much fun. Eventually they all left to go see a Druid about a thing (With his mother sneaking him a package containing some iron spikes and a supportive note as they were leaving). I’m now planning to meet family of the other PC’s along the way.

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“We’re a temple of love, it get’s loud.”

The Druid, offically known as Anarakin but called Charlie by the Paladin, told them the tale of an expedition into the mountains a few years ago (Oddly close to the town the Ranger keeps talking about saving from a bear, a story which most of Waterdeep has heard by now), from which few returned, the rest having been torn apart by some horrific beasts. He knew of one survivor’s whereabouts, so the party went seeking the Cliffwatch Inn to find her. The Paladin took over over her job serving tables so she could talk to the rest of the party, and she told of how the young Denius was a bit full of himself, but wasn’t a bad lad. All of a sudden, there’s horrible screams from the kitchen and *cliffhanger sting!*

Further instalments from the quote file:
“How could it be under the sea if there was a bear?”
“Egg-bearing hips!”
“That’s a terrible idea.” “You just haven’t drunk enough.”
The Google image searches Bear in a Kilt and Bear Nun. Yeah, they’re worth it.
“Large people are probably bears.”
The idea of Watherdhavian speed-dating.

So, even less got done than I was expecting (I should stop panicking pre-game about not having enough plot for them), but it was funnier than I could have hoped for. In a fortnight from now, what is happening in the kitchen? Was the young Noble killed, or was he colluding with the monsters? Who are the thieves with the tattoos and how are they conected with the Night Druids? Will the Wizard bathe again? Hopefully some of these questions will be answered!

*We mostly avoided jokes about a naked 13 year old with a bunch of Priests. It was for the best.

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